Have you ever browsed through a friend or relative’s wedding photographs and thought to yourself that it was a beautiful wedding, but the key players didn’t seem very emotionally involved? That they just smiled for the camera and went through the motions? I’ve thought that — and I’ve thought that about weddings that I know were filled with a full gamut of emotions. The problem is, those emotions didn’t play out when the photographer was there — or the photographer wasn’t ready to capture them.

While I pride myself on always being ready to record real moments as they unfold — if I’m there and something special happens, I will be photographing it! — sometimes key moments take place without the photographer present. That’s why on the wedding day and leading up to it, communication between the bride and groom, the bride and groom and their family, and the bride and groom and their photographer is so, so important. If the groom is going open a special gift or card from his bride the morning of the wedding, the bride should make sure the photographer knows that’s going to happen, and make sure the groom knows not to proceed until the photographer is present. If the bride wants a few moments with her father before they meet to walk down the aisle (these are called father-daughter first looks, and I wish they could happen at every wedding!), the bride needs to make sure the photographer won’t be photographing the ceremony decor at the moment her father enters the bridal suite. Perhaps just as important, I would recommend that every bride and groom ask their photographer for suggestions of how to capture as much meaningful emotion as possible on the wedding day.

The suggestions I would share would be:

1. The more time you have built into your timeline, the more time you’ll have to soak in the day and truly be emotional. If you’re frantically rushing from task to task, the overwhelming emotion you’ll feel will be anxiety.
2. Make sure your close family and friends are involved in quiet, personal moments of the day. These are when the most important interactions take place — the mother pinning in her daughter’s veil, the grandmother clutching her grandson after he’s led his new bride back up the aisle. The most emotional exchanges of the day also often happen between parents and children, not just brides and grooms, so be sure your parents are included as much as possible in your day; it will be incredibly meaningful to you all.
3. Relax and enjoy the moment. The emotions will come — on the dance floor, at the altar, as you say your goodbyes for the night.

And then, when you browse your own wedding photographs years down the road, you’ll remember that your wedding was both beautiful and filled with joy and bittersweet tears and nerves and, above all, so, so much love.~ Laura