Statistically, Thanksgiving through Valentine’s Day is “engagement season” — the time of year when the majority of couples get engaged. Danny and I followed that pattern by getting engaged in January, and as soon as it was official, we felt overwhelmed with wedding planning to-dos. But along with the initial to-dos, there are a few important don’ts — things that can help the early stage of the engagement go smoothly and help keep your relationship with each other, your relationships with family and friends, and your relationship with your bank account on track.Do: Tell your nearest and dearest the good news in person.
This is one thing I can’t stress enough. Your family and your close friends want to hear from you, whether face to face or on the telephone, that you’re getting married. It stings to find out via Facebook that someone in your inner circle is getting married — and it’s even worse to get the news from a third party.

Do: Start working on your wedding date.
Figuring out roughly when you want to get married is a critical first step in planning a wedding. You may want to get married as soon as possible. You may have a specific time of year in mind. You may know that the wedding itself is still a couple years away. The time frame is entirely up to you — just make sure the two of you are on the same page.

Don’t: Promise people invitations to the wedding.
When we were engaged, Danny and I were a little bit shocked at the number of people on the fringes of our social circle who said to us, or to our parents, “Make sure you send us an invitation to the wedding!” Until you know who is on the guest list — which will likely be shaped by venue size and your overall wedding budget, not a lack of a desire to be hospitable and friendly — don’t promise an invite to anyone who might not make the final cut.

Do: Get your engagement ring insured and photographed for documentation purposes.
Some rings may be covered by your homeowners’ or renters’ insurance, but in the middle of all the excitement over the engagement, pause to do some necessary, albeit unromantic ring documentation, just in case your ring were to get lost or stolen. Make sure your ring is insured, make sure you know what is required of you for warranty purposes, such as a yearly inspection or cleaning, and make sure you have clear, close-up pictures of your ring readily available.

Do: Begin evaluating your wedding budget and overall style.
Start figuring out how much money you can or want to spend on your wedding so that you can begin allotting money to different aspects of your wedding. Find your aesthetic, and figure out what types of services you would like from different vendors. Do plenty of research before you begin actually booking vendors and spending money!

Don’t: Contact numerous wedding vendors with a single mass e-mail.
Remember, there are real humans on the other side of the computer screen. When a wedding vendor receives an e-mail inquiry that was clearly mass-blasted to a dozen photographers or a dozen DJs, it’s not only disheartening for the vendor (because nobody likes being treated like an automated machine), but may cost you the individualized, personalized attention you would like in return from that vendor. A vendor doesn’t like receiving an e-mail that simply says “I would like to see your prices” any more than you would like receiving an e-mail in reply that begins with, “Dear Inquiring Bride # 732.”

Do: Focus on your future together.
While it’s easy to get caught up in planning a wedding very quickly, don’t forget what you two are really doing: Committing to spending the rest of your lives together. Plan that, too! Begin thinking about premarital counseling, and life after the wedding. Because, believe me — as much fun as a wedding is, life together is even better!~ Laura